Archive for August, 2006

30
Aug
06

Pictures!

I took lots of pictures last night of everything I have been working on, but now I can’t find the charger for my camera, so now I can’t post them. Yesterday at the LYS one of the ladies encouraged me to make a purse of a cabled shrug I had started, but never finished. I stitched it up, and it’s going to be GREAT. Very excited. I took pictures of my illusion scarf, scrap scarf, and my irish hiking scarf. Now, I need to find the charger.

BB – I hope Dani goes home. I so love Dr. Delicious.

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22
Aug
06

Irish Hiking Scarf

As I got close to the end of the yarn on my IHS, I was really disappointed because the yarn was splitting in spots. It was odd, it wasn’t like that on the other ball. It was a ball of cascade 220. I’ve never seen that before. So it truly is a scarf for one of my boys now, unless it grows a lot when i block it. Pictures to follow.

19
Aug
06

Depression.

I struggle with depression. It’s an everyday occurance for me. Somedays, I function fine, and then other days, it’s like I don’t function at all. I don’t even get to the point where I am making it through the movements just because. Today felt like one of those days, where I wasn’t doing well. I’m unispired, unmotivated. I look at things, and they can just stay the same. I really don’t care. I’m on medication, imagine what I would be like without. The emotional roller coaster is vast, varied, AND FAST. I do care about my boys, tho. It bothers me that my boys see me so unhappy, and that I feel helpless to change how I feel, react, and seem. I can’t even pretend, even tho, I’m sure they see through that. I hate this feeling, and just want it gone, and I want it to stay gone. I hate how washing my hair is an ordeal. How making something to eat is too hard.

Tomorrow is another day, I’m looking forward to it because somedays are like magic and I work. I hope tomorrow is one of those days.

18
Aug
06

scarf ..

I’m still working on my illusion scarf. I have made it through three repeats of the pattern, and I’m actually enjoying it. I, sometimes, have a really hard time following patterns, or any kind of directions really, not just dealing with knitting. I love seeing how the illusion suddenly pops.

I’ve been trying to decide what I am going to do next. I was thinking a sweater would be fun, maybe not, or some lace, but it all comes back down to the following patterns for a long amount of time. I, also, thought about doing the hoover historical blanket. I think learning to double knit would be fun, but there aren’t any babies in my near future. None of my friends are at that stage. I like to knit for someone. It’s not good for me just random.

I’m rambling today, not sure where my post should go.

13
Aug
06

Knitting and Drama

I have finished the first letter on my illusion scarf, and I’m still not sure if I am seeing it yet. I had to frog the first attempt as I noticed that the letters were not going to be in the right order to read. So, the first letter is complete, and I am off to get started on the second. I’m excited, and it’s knitting up nicely.

 My neighbors and I are fighting. While this isn’t uncommon, it really sucks since my neighbor is my uncle. He called up and said some hateful things to me for something a cousin said. I was really upset, and hung up the phone and went and started knocking on his door. He didn’t have the nerve to answer. My cousin is fine, and my uncle seems fine, and I’m the only one who’s upset, and of course, I am the only one who got yelled at. I don’t forgive or forget very well. It, also, takes a lot to upset me, but once I get to that point, whatever relationship it is might as well be over. I seriously don’t see how I will be able to communicate with him now. I don’t know how to get over these kind of things. I want to since he is family, but I am used to family not being enough to keep people together. I’m so used to being left that I withdraw even faster.

I wish he had the courage to yell in my face so I could have yelled back. I feel so disappointed in myself for still being so angry.

 Rambling and talking in circles. I’m going to rent a movie and knit.

10
Aug
06

Illusion

I started off this morning, casting on, and since I am winging it, I cast on too many and the fabric was as long as a blanket, so I frogged it and cast on what looks to be a more managable number. I’ve gotten to the first row of where I want my illusion, but since I’m tired, I’m going to start on it tomorrow.

Also, it looks like I am about to run out of yarn for my Irish Hiking Scarf, so the one I am making now, might end up being for the boys. GRRRR

09
Aug
06

Starting my first illusion scarf. I can’t wait to actually get to the part where I make the illusion. Just casting on, and slowly finish my irish hiking scarf.